Sunday, November 21, 2004
i AM moving on..then i could finally let go.
I've had enough.
no, Don't try to reason with me, this is too much.
I will try not to think of you when i wake up in the morning and ask myself if somehow you are also awake. I have my own life to lead and my whole life to think of. No, I won't even think of you while I'm eating my lunch wondering if you're doing the same thing, because sooner or later i know you will.
NO, Never again will i go to the comfort room and lock myself in just to have some privacy to piteously think of you, cry, sing or do some silly things because of you. And NO, never will i again think of you last when i go to sleep. Sleep is my only rest, so please, don't plague me in my dreams.
I AM MOVING ON.
I'll try to wake up in the morning and smile and think not of why you left but that once that you stayed.
And if I feel the need to cry, it will not be for the future that we could have, not for the regrets that i have nor of the anger that i feel, but I will cry because of a love that i never was able to share with the only man i felt it for. I will not cry for the love that was lost, and not for who left.
I will give my affections to any man who is in need of it, but not my heart because i am still trying to get it back from you. I will give him the love you never wanted, the kiss that i so longed to give you and the words that once was yours. Worthy or not worthy, at least he's here..you're not.
I'll try to hold back the tears when i think of you. I'll just try to smile.
I am moving on...and hoping that the next thing would be letting go.
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dreamed.at .|. 10:39:00 PM